All-Time Bad Guys Team

The premise of this one is simple - we're compiling an all-time team of the baddest dudes at every position.  This is a team of guys that will make you cringe.  There will be players on this roster that you would think have expletives as middle names.  It's a team of guys that you wouldn't want your daughters bringing home; all-around bad dudes.  Some qualifying points - we didn't necessarily put a guy on here because he showed up on the Mitchell Report.  While cheating and taking steroids might be a bullet point on the resume of a bad dude, making this team requires more than that.  We also shied away from really obscure players as we felt like it was important to highlight players that contributed on the field.  The list of guys we've put together is fairly diverse; some of these guys have lengthy rap sheets and some were hated by teammates, fans and media.  Many of them had failed marriages, drug/alcohol issues and were prone to temper tantrums.  Regardless, they weren't guys you would call "role models" for one reason or another.  Here's our list, tell us what you think.

C - AJ Pierzynski
His resume - Named Top 10 GQ "Most Hated Athletes" in 2006, allegedly kneed a trainer in the groin when the trainer came out to check on him after he was clipped by a ball in the dirt, Ozzie Guillen said this of AJ, "If you play against him, you hate him.  If you play with him, you hate him a little less."

1B - Pete Rose 
His resume - a degenerate gambler, abusive to reporters and fans, spent time in prison for tax evasion and received a lifetime ban from baseball for gambling on baseball while he was playing/managing.  

2B - Jeff Kent
His resume - Jeff Kent makes this list as one of the worst teammates in baseball history.  He stayed out of legal trouble and was never accused of abusing drugs or alcohol but Kent's mouth and attitude makes him a worthy candidate at second base.  He would speak his mind and throw teammates under the bus in a manner that made you feel like he just wasn't interested in being liked.

SS - Jose Offerman
His resume - Offerman has the dubious (and unofficial) distinction of being the only man banned from two different leagues for non-gambling/drug related violations.  He was suspended from the Independent Atlantic League in 2007 for charging an opposing pitcher wielding a bat.  Both the opposing pitcher and catcher were injured in the altercation (a severe concussion ended the catcher's career) and Offerman was charged with second degree assault.  In 2010, while managing in the Dominican Republic winter league, Offerman came onto the field to protest the ejection of his catcher for arguing balls and strikes and threw a  right hook at the umpire, dropping him to the ground.

3B - Bad Bill Dahlen
His resume - Dahlen, primarily a dead ball era shortstop, holds the unofficial record for most player ejections (although unofficial because he spent some time as a player/manager, it is said that he was ejected 65 times in his career and managed only four seasons so the assumption is the only player that could be remotely close to him is John Evers, who was ejected 52 times and also managed three seasons).  Bad Bill was known for his temper and off-field transgressions, which included gambling and heavy drinking.  A book titled "Bad Bill Dahlen: the Rollicking Life and Times of an Early Baseball Star" chronicles the lifestyle that Dahlen lived - he was careless and unfocused, often showing up minutes before the game, he was abusive towards umpires and it has been said that he would purposely get ejected so that he could get to the racetrack early.  He was, however, a great baseball player and is considered one of the greatest Hall of Fame snubs by many.  


DH - Jose Canseco
His resume - he was a cheater/steroid user, he was banned from the Mexican Leagues for refusing a drug test, he alienated teammates with his attitude and demeanor, he is a convicted wife-beater, he was known as a party animal and Canseco's book is the straw the broke the camel's back with regards to the steroid era.  Canseco should be applauded for coming clean about steroids but it's hard not to feel like he only did it as a self-promotional stunt (considering all of the self-promotional stunts he has shamelessly endured).  He has two failed marriages to his name and a pretty lengthy rap sheet which includes reckless driving (he once led police officers on a 15-mile chase), firearms violations (he was found carrying a loaded semi-automatic pistol in California), battery charges for ramming his FIRST wife's BMW with his Porsche, a wife-beating charge filed by his SECOND wife, an aggravated battery charge in 2001 (he and his twin brother Ozzie beat up some tourists... no big deal), a missed court appearance that was set up to work out a custody dispute over his then-6-year-old child, probation violations (tested positive for steroids) and he was detained by immigration officials in San Diego for attempting to bring fertility drugs in from Mexico.  
His resume - Bradley lands on this list as arguably the most volatile and hot-tempered player in baseball history.  He was once jailed after a routine traffic stop after refusing a ticket and speeding away.  His action resulted in speeding and fleeting charges and he was given a three day sentence.  He was once banned from his own team's spring training and tore his ACL confronting a first-base umpire.  His not-so-shining moment occurred in Texas when he attempted to climb into the broadcaster's booth to confront Ryan Lefebvre who had made comments about Bradley's temperament.  He was also arrested in 2011 for making criminal threats to his wife.  The charges were dropped in favor of counseling.  Milton's wife has since filed for divorce.

OF - Delmon Young
His resume - he probably penciled himself onto this list when he threw his bat at an umpire after striking out in a minor league game.  But if that wasn't enough, he solidified his spot on this team with his recent arrest in NY City. Young has been accused of making anti-Semitic remarks to a yarmulke-wearing panhandler and attacking a bystander who tried to intervene.  

OF - Lenny Dykstra
His resume - the player known as "Nails" and "Dude" is probably the captain of this squad.  He has a lengthy resume which includes a drunk driving accident which injured Lenny and Phillies teammate Darren Daulton, a sexual harassment arrest (charges alleged by an employee of a car wash that he owned), a failed marriage, financial ruin, a bad check written to a female escort (which she posted on her blog as proof of the occurrence), sexual assault accusations by a housekeeper, bankruptcy fraud, grand theft auto, identity theft, possession of cocaine, ecstasy and HGH and an indecent exposure charge in August 2011.  He was also named in the Mitchell Report... shocking, I know.  His bankruptcy fraud trial is set to begin in early June.  Dykstra currently resides in a California State Prison serving a three-year sentence related to grand theft charges.  His federal bankruptcy hearingis set to begin within the next couple months (after filing for bankruptcy, Dykstra allegedly hid, sold or destroyed more than $400,000 worth of items from his $18.5 million foreclosed mansion without permission of the bankruptcy trustee).  If convicted on all charges related to embezzlement, obstruction of justice, bankruptcy fraud and making false statements, Dykstra could face up to 80 years in federal prison.  Nailed, dude...

OF - Ty Cobb
His resume - a fearless competitor, the hot-tempered and unapologetic Cobb was an extremely volatile man.  By most accounts he was a racist but besides that, his personal life included two failed marriages and an estranged son, both attributed to alcoholism and a combative/demanding personality.  On the field, Cobb did not subscribe to the theories of good sportsmanship; he did everything he could to gain a competitive advantage (even if that advantage came at the expense of rules and the health of his opponents).  He alienated teammates and opponents with his acts of gamesmanship and his extremely lofty expectations.  There are two incidences that stand out in my mind.  The first occurred in 1912 when Cobb assaulted a handicapped heckler in the stands.  The second occurred when Cobb allegedly beat up three drunks who had harassed Cobb and his wife as they were in their car.  The story goes that Cobb, despite being stabbed himself, beat two of the men badly enough that they ran away.  The third was not so lucky; Cobb allegedly beat the man to a bloody pulp and some stories suggest that Cobb thought he was dead.  No one really knows because Cobb did not report the incident to his manager or the authorities.  He and his wife went on their merry way.


SP - Dwight Gooden
His resume - Gooden is probably the on-field ace of the staff as he was one of the most promising young pitchers the game has ever seen.  Off the field, he was a train wreck waiting to happen.  His rap sheet includes driving while intoxicated with a suspended license, misdemeanor battery (for punching his girlfriend), three failed drug tests (cocaine) while playing, probation/parole violations, leaving the scene of an accident, endangering the welfare of a child and other motor vehicle violations.  His signature performance occurred in 2010 when he was arrested after leaving the scene of a traffic accident... under the influence with a child passenger.  


SP - Kenny Rogers
His resume - Rogers was arrogant and pompous.  He was widely accused of using pine tar on his pitching hand in a World Series game in 2006 and there are a lot of sources out there that suggest he took steroids, as well.  But the incident that makes Rogers Bad Dude Worthy is the 2005 Cameraman Assault which left him with a 20 game suspension, a $50,000 fine and a misdemeanor assault charge.

SP - Denny McLain
His resume - while Gooden was probably the on-field ace, McLain was undoubtedly the off-field el capitan.  McLain was a bookmaker and an obsessive gambler, especially in the later stages of his (self-inflicted) short MLB career.  His affinity for bookmaking led him into the ranks of organized crime.  On the field, he carelessly marched to the beat of his own arrhythmic drum.  He was once suspended for dumping buckets of waters on two sportswriters, he chartered a group called the "Underminers Club" which was a group of five players dedicated to getting their manager (Ted Williams) fired and he once showed up late to the start of an All-Star game he was scheduled to start because he was at a dental appointment (a pilot, McLain chose to fly himself to the game but didn't make it in time).  His pilot's license would come in handy in his post-baseball career as a con-man; he reportedly once accepted over $160,000 to fly a wanted felon out of the country.  Besides that, he was imprisoned for drug trafficking (cocaine), embezzlement and racketeering (mob related; his charges later reversed).  Following prison and rehab stints in the mid-1980's to early 1990's, McLain and several partners bought a business that went bankrupt.  In 1996, he was convicted on charges of embezzlement, mail fraud and conspiracy in connection with the theft of $2.5 million from the employee pension fund.  Since then, he has been arrested and imprisoned twice for outstanding warrants.  

SP - Dock Ellis
His resume - Ellis is another guy that marched to the beat of his own drum.  And sometimes those drums sounded like aliens wrapped in cellophane.  Ellis was a vocal civil rights activist who spoke his mind recklessly.  He was combative and didn't care what people thought.  He didn't have many off-field incidences but on the field, he was more than a handful and his belligerence started early and followed him through his professional career.  In high school, Ellis refused to play baseball at Gardena High School in protest against his coach's racism.  While in the minors, he once went into the stands and swung a leaded bat at a racist heckler in Batavia, NY.  In the pros, he really hit his stride; in 1972 he was maced by a security guard at Cincinnati's Riverfront Stadium who wouldn't let him into the Pirates clubhouse and in 1974, Ellis took it upon himself to "fight back" against the Big Red Machine, vying to hit everyone.  Before the game, Ellis reportedly said (and I quote), "We gonna get down.  We gonna do the do (and) I'm going to hit these mother *&^% ."  The game started off with three straight hit-by-pitches, a walk (guess he missed) and two more pitches thrown at Hall of Famer Johnny Bench before Pirates manager Danny Murtaugh removed Ellis.  But the creme de la creme came in 1970 when Ellis threw a no-hitter against the Padres under the influence of LSD, admitting to it 14 years later.  

RP - John Rocker
His resume - he doesn't have the rap sheet of some of the other guys on this list but the venom that John Rocker has spewed with his mouth is unmatched.  There aren't many cultures, races, religious/sexual orientations that Rocker hasn't insulted.  He's a self-promoting racist which makes him a despicable attention seeker.  He's a bigot, a sexist, and a homophobe and he was implicated in a steroid ring (an admitted steroid user) .  There is absolutely nothing to like about John Rocker.

3 comments:

  1. Oh.. gotta throw Hal Chase in there somewhere. The worst of the worst.

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  2. Manager: Billy Martin.

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  3. Take Rose off the list and put Hal Chase at first base. His backup will be Chick Gandil. Rose's gambling issues did not affect his playing days; the other two may be the most crooked players in the history of the game.

    The story of Cobb killing the guy in Detroit is not complete without relating what he told biographer Al Stump: "See a doctor? I did nothing of the sort, dammit! I played the next day and got two hits in three times up!" (The stats back up his statement, if the incident is true.)

    Pierzynski-- good one. Giants fans still shudder at the memory of that trade-- Nathan and Lariano one year of this self-centered jerk. Sabean's low point.

    Kent, well, I guess the "truck washing" story gets him on the list, and most second basemen tend to be sweet guys anyway. :-) But his only public blowup was with the hyper-sensitive Barry Bonds, whom I see with much relief (and not a little astonishment) is NOT on this list.

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